resolutions or no resolutions?

I don't know if now is the right for me to talk about New Year Resolutions or not. But what i DO know is that the whole thing sounds too cliché no? It's November already and in a few weeks time it's gonna be Christmas and New Year. Hello? Even my 2008's Resolutions for 2009 has not been fulfilled yet. Well, it isn't that difficult of a thing to do, you know, making resolutions with hopes so high, wishing you could fulfill each and every single thing on your Lists of Things to Accomplish in 20** blablabla. MAKING it is easy but ACHIEVING it is very darn susah. hah. There goes me talking in rojak again. At first, you think, hey, its only the 1st of January, I still have plenty of time to waste and complete my list before the end of year comes knocking at my door. But only after the 10th month you realised that everything's going so fast and you forgot about the darn list you made. And yes, I AM talking about myself and my darn list. With so little time management skills and the unability to prioritise; THAT and being the procrastinator(i love this word) that I am, it really is a challenging and tough task to accomplish. 


However, I am pretty proud of one thing. And that thing is my cooking skills. YES, i can make a decent spaghetti or macaroni (not macaroni and cheese, mind you) without wasting too much Prego sauce. This, and the fact that I am now an accomplished maker of pancakes. Yummy. This is so my kind of food. No offence to nasik putih or kuey tiao tho. It's just that this is so easily made and you don't really need to steal any recipes of the internet How-To-Cook site or from the magazines. No manuals whatsoever. ok I'm gonna let some secret out here. I stole it from mum's recipe. Well, she doesn't really need one anyway, cuz she's good at it already. I wish i could learn how to cook by heart. you know, like when to put in all these stuffs and most importantly, WHAT ingredients to include in the pot. The first time I tried making the spaghetti, I had to jot down the whole process of making it on a piece of paper. Haha. Ibu pun cakap: Takpe la yang penting kene ade minyak masak, api, and bawang. Haha. Bahan-bahan lain tak penting sangat pun, you can practically cook any dish with these ingredients. No kidding. :O After a few tries, I managed to serve the whole family a fine AND super finger-licking-delicious pasta with my newly acquired cooking skills. Yay. Limited to spaghetti related style sahaja ofcourse. hehe.


Another important thing I managed to put a check into my list is the fact that I have grown to be a bit wiser. A year older, and a year wiser. Yes, my way of thinking may not be as matured compared to other 19 year old kids out there, but in terms of learning from my mistakes and making sure that I don't repeat the same kind of mistakes I did really made me think twice and it helped me to develop as a person. 


I have also learnt that TRUST is not just another thing you can take for granted. After all, it takes a fairly long time and courage to build up trust, but only seconds to destroy it. You can't just say you trust someone and turn your back on them and betray their trust. It doesn't work that way. That's what hypocrites do. Telling people to trust you whereas you don't even trust yourself. A selfish bitch I once were, I now know that it really IS hard to trust someone. Maybe the reason why it was so hard for me to trust is because I worry too much, you know. When you worry, your thoughts are filled with these negative things and you start to feel insecure, anxious, dll. But despite of all that, i put my trust issues aside and started to trust. 
Whole-heartedly. 


I've learnt that lying is unnecessary. Unless if you're a very good liar. Or actor. No lah. Seriously, i don't know why I lied in the first place. Thinking back about all the lies I unsuccessfully managed to run away from, it made me feel really stupid. You can't lie. Especially to someone who reads you like a book. That person can definitely TELL that you're lying.